Kim Luong Vuong's blog

Where there is a will, there is a way.

Daily Archives: February 15, 2013

Family? What does that mean to me?

I want to shoot myself because of my family

For most of us, family means everything, they are people whom you love and care about. Family is the place where you can find the shelter, love and support. Family contains people who you can not live without them.

But, still there are many unlucky people who had to, have to, and will have to endure mental or physical (or both) pains caused by their own family. I am one of those unfortunate people who God forgot to bless.

I have drunken father who always yells and batters family members after drinking. He usually destroys our properties as well. This happened almost every two or three days. It was so frequent that I got used to it. Now, maybe he becomes old, or just because I rarely visit home, the frequency decreases. Beside that man, my family was also ruined by the mother who always has grudge against me. I received punishments from her so many times that I can not count or remember clearly. Finally, that is the sister that I can not get along with.

Family means to be sharing and understanding each other but it only means obedient in my family. The conversations were always one way. They said, I listen and do what they want. No comments, objections or reasons were accepted even if those were right and reasonable.

Everyone has the right to choose their own path that they want to follow but I didn’t. When I was a child, they didn’t let me to learn what I liked. They forced me to study subjects that they thought were the best for me. Then, after finishing secondary school, I had to apply for the school that I didn’t want to at all for the same reason. Naturally, I failed because I was not good enough but they blame me for months. After graduating from high school, I made up my mind that I would walk my own way from that moment. Once again, they planned to decide my future and I rejected it. They immediately showed their true faces. At first, they tried to build up a miserable future. After failing to do it themselves, they asked their relatives, their acquaintances to convey that ideas to me. Finally, they threatened me. I somehow managed to overcome the obstacles thanks to my determination but the relationship between me and my parents won’t be able to become normal again.

Being born in this family is the extremity misfortune. Because of that, I have allergy to any ideal family stories. I feel extremely uncomfortable whenever someone mentions about my family.

I wish they simply disappeared from my life.